Chastity Bites


The demonic countess Elisabeth Bathory, known for slaughtering hundreds of virgins during the seventeenth century in order to conserve her youth and beauty, is still going at it. It has become a tad trickier to find virtuous teenagers these days, but with her hypnotic charm and newfound employment as an abstinence educator at a major high school, things are looking up. The gender conscious and ambitious student Leah might be our only hope in combating this ancient vanity. Too bad that she is still a virgin – and by extension fair game – herself.

By means of sharp humor and witty dialogue Chastity Bites stabs decisively at the double standards and sexual hypocrisy of upper-class conservative America. Promiscuous anti-feminists, Botox-consuming housewives, self-conscious It-girls and republican moral censors, they all get theirs. And finally comes the real showdown – the one where Elisabeth Bathory hopefully will bite the dust once and for all.

Text: Jake Bolin

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